I still enjoy the concept of the movie theater. Some films, to me, are best enjoyed with a crowd on a gigantic screen, bag of popcorn and a soda at your side. Unfortunately, a lot of things conspire to drag down the theater fun from the idealized version I have in my head. There’s two factors at play here – the theater itself, and the patrons of the theater.
What’s wrong with the theater itself? It’s too expensive, for one. Sure, if you just buy a matinee ticket, it isn’t so bad – $7 is the going rate around here in Boston. That’s just the beginning, though. Let’s say you want a snack (and they’re all terrible for you, by the way). The going rate for terrible, oversalted popcorn covered in coconut oil ranges from $5 for a “small” to $6 for a large. Reread that. Doesn’t make any sense, does it?
Then it’s the other jerkbenders in the theater. The worst are the texters. Cell phone screens are like miniature suns in a dark theater – wicked distracting. Can’t people enjoy a movie in peace?
My favorite movie theater in this area is the Somerville Theater. It has one screen, but they serve real popcorn with real butter at reasonable prices. Plus, they have alcohol. It’s a great place to watch a movie. There’s a similar theater in New York state that I visit when I’m out in the Pittsfield area – the Crandall. One screen, cheap tickets, new movies, and $3 buckets of popcorn. More of these, please! Plus, they deal with annoying people very quickly.
When I was in Ohio last week, my buddy Tony and I watched Zombieland at a second run theater. These are things we don’t have around here – in fact, the concept of a second run, or dollar theater, was only explained to me about a year ago! $3 to get in on a Saturday night is not a bad deal at all. However, their concessions were more expensive than out here in Boston even – they’re still making their money. Still, $3 for a movie. That ain’t bad.